You largely constructed your depression. It wasn't given to you. Therefore, you can deconstruct it.- Albert Ellis
We teach people that they upset themselves. We can't change the past, so we change how people are thinking, feeling and behaving today.
There are three musts that hold us back: I must do well. You must treat me well. And the world must be easy.
The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.
The art of love is largely the art of persistence.
Self-esteem is the greatest sickness known to man or woman because it's conditional.
Rational beliefs bring us closer to getting good results in the real world.
People have motives and thoughts of which they are unaware.
People got insights into what was bothering them, but they hardly did a damn thing to change.
People do not just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.
People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection.
Most people would have given up when faced with all the criticism I have received over the years.
Many psychoanalysts refused to let me speak at their meetings. They were exceptionally vigorous because I had previously been an analyst and they were very angry at my flying the coop.
In the old days we used to get more referrals, because people had insurance that paid for therapy. Now they belong to HMOs, and we can only be affiliated with a few HMOs.
If something is irrational, that means it would not work. It's usually unrealistic.
